Friday, November 7, 2008

Patience and Waiting

I believe that the waiting from Monday with Dr. Kim when no information was given until Thursday with Dr.Esquival not knowing if He would explain things was the hardest time so far. There are people that live everyday waiting and not knowing on a much grander scale . My heart goes out to them.

Learning to rest on the Lord in the waiting times is something I'm learning slowly. Yet it was and is often in those times the Lord and my relationship grows more personal and real.

Another area I've discovered to be tough is family reactions -- I might be comforted by God and have peace but it affects each person and each person allows things to affect them differently. It is hard to trust God to care for each family member and meet them where they are and bring them to the next step in their relationship to Him. Yet his love and care for me lets me know He is there for them as well. My prayer is they will receive what He wants to give them.


Those were the surgeon's words of what to do next "Eat anything and everything (protein) and walk walk walk.

Dr. Jesus Esquival met with us yesterday. He explained the physical and medical background of what is going on in my body as he and science understand it. Due to the failure to release the pathology blocks , he was unable to say conclusively what is actually going on with me. From what he had, he believes it is the low level which is good. From what I understand it would not require continued treatment after the next surgery or a rush to surgery. He said there are 3 options: do nothing; surgery with hot chemo; chemo and radiation. From what he sees the third is not a necessary option in my case.

Meanwhile what can I do -- Eat and Walk Eat and Walk Eat and Walk.

I did lose weight with this last surgery and if I have more surgery as Dr. Esquival recommends I will lose more so Eat and Walk Eat and Walk. :)

Friday, October 31, 2008

This Week- Daughter's birthday- and Dr. Reports

Saturday is my Sister's Birthday. Sunday is my Daughter's Birthday which we are looking forward to the family dinner. Monday is a visit to the surgeon for the medical records. Wednesday is a visit to the dermatologist and Thursday is the visit to the Appendix specialist. There are only 2 doctors that deal with this and they are in Maryland. I will be going to the one at St. Agnes hospital and then getting a second opinion from the one at Mercy hospital.

Big Foot, Flowers, Notes, Care, Dinners, Prayers

The love we have received has been overwhelming. Thank YOu Thank YOu Thank YOu. The notes have made us smile, laugh, cry, rest, etc. The flowers are gorgeous and no two alike!

I must share a lovely stuffed giraffe I received called Big Foot. It is so soft and it works perfect for rubbing instead of itching the rash from the allergic reaction. When I use it it know I am being rubbed with the love and care with which it was sent .

Several times I've asked people to feel how soft this giraffe is and they seem to hold back. Duh! It took me a bit to realize they are afraid of getting the "itch". It is not contagious to anyone else. It just lives within me.

For you Sci- Fi Fans- The Alien invades my body

While in the hospital, an alien in the form of an allergic reaction invaded my body.

Let me back up a minute and let your know that I was spoiled by family, friends etc. My sister spent night one with me and explained through out the night what the doctor had said and helped me stay comfortable. Two nights my dear friend Dorothy a nurse stayed with me and what a gift that was as we visited John every 15 mins. carrying "the Pole" with us. it was Dorothy that noticed the rash but it was not important to the staff of the hospital.

It seems that when I was released from the hospital- the alien really took over my body and began to grow. A visit to the surgeon- led to an emergency visit to my dermatologist who said " this is very unique - ( see I am and so are you uniquely made by God) I'm not sure what it is from but it is inside and is very serious. He put me on 2 medications and designed a special cream just for me adding a touch of cool mint. What love . Yes the beast is coming under control.

Surgery Over- One in a million

My husband came into the recovery room and I remember looking at him and saying "It's cancer!?" With tears he said yes. I heard him say to someone it was the first thing she said.

Yes, I am one in a million. I have a rare cancer of the appendix. I could have told you I was rare and one in a million but then you knnow that better than I do. Actually God says in the Psalms that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. There are no two alike. Our DNA's are all different!

But I am living proof.

The presentation to the family was very direct and devastating and I slept through it all.

As the Lord would have it my sister's dear friend has been battling with appendix cancer for 4 years and so Martha (my youngest sister could ask questions) The result is My cancer is contained ! great news ! Although the cancer is incurable , it is not untreatable.
This surgery removed my appendix, cyst, and part of the colon. I must tell you that the pain from the colonoscopy is gone and I feel like anyone else that has had an appendectomy.

I will face a future surgery for the cysts in the lower cavity . It is to be a complete hysterectomy with a portion of the small colon removed. The plan is to use a technic found in Maryland of inserting Hot Chemo at the time of surgery and removing it.

Surgery Arrives

October 23rd- The night before my daughter had her 16th birthday dinner without me as I prepped for today. There was much laughter but to her loss too much talk about the surgery.

When I arrived at the hospital with my husband we were ushered into our "suite". I was so sure we would not go on time I told my older daughter to come after work and my younger daughter went to school.

While in pre op I was in a chair and the nurse said she would be lowering the head of the chair. I said fine . I don't know if you can picture this but as the head reclined for some reason-- I held my feet straight out in front of me . Pat was in the room with my husband as she works in the hospital and she said Aunt Becky did you know there is a foot rest under your feet. Laughter followed , joking with the nurse too. Quite the cartoon.

Later after the surgery -- as I read verses in Isaiah about resting in the Lord. The Lord reminded me of this cartoon and seemed to say I'm here to support you all the time and way through this rest on me-- You don't need to support yourself-- I Am your support. and there was that "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh"